T minus 11

So the countdown is running... Only 11 days left until I go back to work. As you can imagine I have tons of mixed feelings. I'm sad to leave Brady at daycare, yet looking forward to some time away from his demands. I wonder how he will do without me there... will he cry all day, will he take the bottle ok, will they hold him, talk to him and play with him? All these questions will swim around in my head those first days. And that too worries me, as I'll be at my first days in my new job... I need to have a clear and attentive mind. Gosh, I'm so nervous about that too. Its been 6 years since my first day on the job... I haven't not known what to do at my job for 6 years!! And to top it off, I don't even know much about the services and community that I'll be marketing. Talk about overwhelming.
Dylan and Riley will do just fine at their new school. They'll have each other, to help with the transition, and they are just dying to be around other kids, and do those fun "school things." The only worry I have with the 2 of them, is that they won't want to come home at the end of the day.

When I look past all these worries, I do see some joy... Joy to be out of the house, joy to meet new people, joyful of the few extra dollars coming in, and the joy of success. I'm really excited to have a new job, that has so little to do with social work and direct care. I will be in more of a managerial role, and rarely in the trenches. What a nice change!! I can't wait to feel like a "business woman" again... my stent as a stay at home mom was short and sweet. I'm tired of being bored at home... Although I'm going, going, going, with the 3 of them around here, its boring kind of stuff (laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc.) I like to be out and about, and I'm running out of "doable" things to do with them. I've said it before and I'll say it again... I'm a better mom because I work outside of the house. I have more patience and overall appreciation for my children when I miss them all day and then greeted by their shining faces when I come to pick them up. Plus because our time can be so limited in the evenings, they get my undivided attention leaving everyone happy at the end of the day.

So which way will it go... Fears and Tears or Handshakes and Smiles? My guess is all of the above, but more smiles than fears.